Me: ok cool *literally just says the lyrics of Short Skirt/Long Jacket by Cake*
needless to say, I’ve been thinking about this all day and have over analyzed this to try to determine exactly what this character would be. So class:
I want a girl with a mind like a diamond I want a girl who knows what’s best
Its clear from these lines that she has high intelligence and wisdom. Intelligence is emphasized with the lines “
She is fast and thorough/And sharp as a tack” and considering she is fast she likely has high dexterity.
So this is a Dex/Wisdom/Intelligence build which makes me think that she is a ranger. She may, however be using a dueling fighting style instead of archery, since later lines say she “uses a machete” so she clearly has still with one-handed weaponry.
Her alignment is suggested in two instances. One being “With fingernails that shine like justice.” Though this doesn’t necessarily mean she idealizes justice, this can be implied. So she is on the good end of the good/evil spectrum, and because she “uses a machete to cut through red tape” she clearly is not lawful. She does not get bogged down with bureaucracy but cuts through it. There is not other indications that she chaotic, so I am inclined to call her neutral, making her neutral good.
Her race is harder to pin down, but given that she was “eyes that burn like cigarettes,” that may suggest that she was red or orange eyes. This means Drow or Tiefling. Now, given that she also has, “shoes that cut” this could suggest that she has sharp hooves, meaning Tiefling. I would also point out that she changes her name from Kitty to Karen, and Tiefling are known for taking on new names.
So TL:DR, the girl with a short skirt and long jacket is a neutral good tiefling ranger named Karen who specializes in a dueling fighting style
This is the best D&D-related post I’ve seen in months, fantastic work.
The MCU is a whole new world and thank god for that because Marvel comics have become a goddamn train wreck.
but listen tho, i will not rest until i have that capwolf figurine in my disgusting hands
Wait. Werewolf Cap, Alpha Steve, or whatever was an ACTUAL CANON THING!?!?! Omfg, the marvel comics writers were years ahead of us with this trash, *years*.
Not only is it canon.
But you have to specify which CapWolf. CapWolf Steve:
Photoshopping bricks over peoples faces for no reason.
Ominous photos of socks.
A laptop built only for gay people.
A fictional character buys out a company somehow.
A splinter cell within the Flat Earth society starts an even worse conspiracy theory involving magnets being fake 100% unironically
A new craze similar to planking where people balance couches on one leg in increasingly bizarre location
Two youtubers get into a fued where they cook increasingly elaborate and expensive pasta recipes.
A dude from Oregon trains an exotic animal to fly a plane, the animals face becomes the hot new reaction meme.
Danny Devito livestreams himself in multiple locations across the world at once, no one ever figures out how he did it, when question about the livestream he acts as though it never happened.
Fortnite made illegal in one specific country due to a typo in a law, yet after the quality of life improves after banning the game they just leave the law as is.
